Being Present vs Mindfulness

Physically, you’re at work in a meeting. But mentally, you’re on next summer’s vacation you’ve been planning, on the water with a cold drink in hand. Ah, much better, right? Two phrases thrown around frequently in the Emotional Intelligence and Wellness industry are “mindfulness” and “being present”. While being “mentally elsewhere” is all too relatable, both mindfulness and the skill of being present have a strong foothold in our personal and professional development. And, both are a scaffold for which numerous other soft skills will inevitably improve! These two skills/phrases have become quite trendy, and often used interchangeably. But, while they are similar at face value, there are profound differences between being present, and being mindful. Lucky for us, our 4-legged coworkers are absolute experts at both. 

First, let’s unpack what “being present” means as people. When someone is fully present, they are mentally and physically here, in the moment. When you’re in conversation, and they are truly, actively, listening. Presence is about attention, where is your mind, and where are you directing your attention right now? When you’re present, you’re aware of what’s happening not only around you, but within you in real time. So, what would it look like to think you’re being present, but not? It can be something as subtle as you’re in a conversation, they’re still talking, and you’re already planning your reply to them. It’s just that easy- your thoughts, your attention, is now on your own response and not on what they are speaking. While you may still be hearing what they’re saying, you are not actively listening, and you’re not fully present in the moment anymore. Being present grounds us, and it is the entry point to connection, communication, and so on!

With an understanding of presence, how does mindfulness differ? Mindfulness builds on from being present. Presence brings us to the moment; mindfulness teaches us how to live in the moment. To be mindful is to be present with awareness and acceptance. Acceptance is absolutely crucial to mindfulness, we need to be aware of the present moment and what thoughts, feelings, and even physical sensations we have. But the key to mindfulness actually lies in doing it without judgement. Often, we judge our thoughts as if they were facts, assessing and evaluating them to determine them to be true or false.  This can lead us into self-criticism and self-doubt, which directly impacts our self-esteem and emotional well-being.  Understandably, this becomes a vicious cycle that compounds with all of the thoughts (“noise”) in our heads.  Recognising that our thoughts are not facts, and that our thoughts are significantly influenced by our emotions and experiences, clears the way for successful mindfulness. Mindfulness about how you relate to the moment. Observing without judgment, staying curious and compassionate to yourself. Mindfulness deepens presence, it brings intentionality and emotional regulation.

Presence is being here. Mindfulness is being here with awareness and acceptance.

So, what about the horse? Anytime we talk about the neuroscience of horses, we could go on and on and on! But, while we could dive into the science of how and why, let’s keep it simple. Horses are prey animals. They never hunt or kill, they are always the hunted, with predators seeking them out as a meal. Because of this, they live in pure presence. The kind of presence humans can only dream of having! They need to be 100% in the moment because their life literally depends on it. They are constantly tuned into the now for safety and connection. They are completely in the present of themselves, their environment, and each other. A moment of distraction is a moment of weakness and could be devastating for the herd. Horses don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future; their awareness is immediate and honest. When we interact with them, they mirror our inner state, showing us when we’re distracted or incongruent. They respond to grounded, mindful energy that is calm, clear, and consistent. Through them, we experience mindfulness in action, we’re able to notice our inner world, adjust, and re-center.

Let us share with you an experience a client had with Chesney (our American Paint Quarter Horse) that reminds us how quickly and easily our thoughts can deceive us. The objective in the course was “being present”.  All the client needed to do was lead her 4-legged teammate, Chesney, over a set of four poles that were each elevated off the ground 4 inches.  The goal was to do so without knocking the poles off their holders. They cleared the first two no problem, but going over the third pole, Chesney clipped it with his back hoof and it fell off the holders.  The fourth pole they again cleared. When we asked the client if she had any idea why Chesney clipped only that one pole, she initially said she couldn’t tell why he clipped it.  After we reminded her that Chesney feels her thoughts and is assessing if he is in fact safe with her or if there is leadership in her presence- she immediately confessed that going over poles 1 and 2 she was completely in the moment, aware of her body language, what Chesney was doing and achieving the goal of going over the poles.  But, on the third pole her thoughts slipped out of the moment and she was thinking about making spaghetti for dinner, and Chesney clipped the pole. A simple but profound lesson that was completely normal for Chesney but game-changing for our client. With her thinking about dinner, she was distracted, which meant he didn’t feel safe and was reluctant to go with her over the pole. Consequently, he dragged his feet and the pole fell over. She heard his hoof clip it and she immediately came back to the present moment, and that’s why Chesney cleared the final pole. 

So: presence allows us to connect in the moment, but mindfulness helps us stay connected through awareness and acceptance. In relationships and communication, presence builds connection, and mindfulness sustains it through compassion and understanding. We can parallel this to leadership, teamwork, or family life and from there the growth of all other emotional intelligence soft skills can stem.

At Tacktics Galena, we partner with horses to help improve people’s Emotional Intelligence (EI) through our internationally certified and globally acclaimed Equine-Assisted Learning programs and certified Emotional Intelligence coaching + assessments. When we improve our EI we will improve our life! Tacktics offers training for individuals, teams, groups, and leaders.  We have pre-designed courses in Team Building and Leadership, but also curate internationally certified training specific to the client’s needs; from assessments, to coaching, to chosen courses,to certifications of completed competencies, and retreats. Tacktics is definitely the place to level up your Emotional Intelligence!